King
Kong: (1976 remake) Talk about your bloody sexual frustration,
mates! This one’s got it all. Dwan, blonde bimbo extraordinaire,
is being married to Kong, a giant 50 foot bloody ape who’s not seen a female
of his species in bugger-all knows how long. She is not amused.
Despite the “Kong feels her up and attempts to reveal the goodies (to little
avail)” scene, this after several other teasing wet-linen type shots, my
lament is still quite palpable. The movie’s ape antics begin when
Dwan is kidnapped by the Kong-god revering island natives, drugged while
in shorts and a T-shirt, then she is suddenly thrust forth by chieftains
onto the alter in a native wedding gown. Convenient. I was
native ape-boy # 1 here. Goodness lads, what you missed… Sigh,
all this and NO ONE gets off.
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REBUTTAL:
The
Further Adventures of Tennessee Buck. Playboy model Kathy Shower
gets captured by natives along with our heroes in bad 80’s b-flick.
She’s drugged, her naked bod held down and well-oiled by native women (I
was exempt from this scene (DAMN!), but at least I coached… cough cough,
yeah…) and given over to chieftain as a toy for the evening. She
has little fight left in her after the head of her hubby is tossed in as
a gift for her. Poor girl.
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