Bob has been in the service of hundreds of Evil Overlords, Dictators, power mad Nazis, criminals, Kings, Queens, Dukes, Counts, Viceroys, Warlords and more, so he knows his trade exceptionally well.  He’s trained his minions to serve you very well also, and together they bring to your stronghold a wealth of knowledge and trades that can only help to make your job of ruling the universe easier.
Bob’s services include:
- PROPER bondage: Your good-hearted nemesis, any of his cohorts, nor your damsel in distress will never escape our patented knots, shackles and chains.
- Preparing of captured damsels for use in Overlord’s bedchamber:  We bind, strip, wash, clean, brush, adorn, bejewel… anything YOU want her to be when she’s brought before you, because YOU’RE the boss!
- Virgin sacrifices.  ‘Nuff said.
- Closed-circuit observations: The era and décor of your stronghold can be matched by either magic crystal balls or TV cameras and sets for the observations of minions and prisoners both – for your health as well as our mutual pleasure.
- Training of slaves, slave auctioning, etc (live band provided during local auctions)
- Extra defense if stronghold is under siege (complete anti-‘run-away!’ policy).  You provide the weapons, we provide the manpower.  No angry, torch-wielding mob is going to get through OUR boys, much less your nemesis and his overblown cohorts.
- Pets: dogs, trained horses, Demons with proper resumes… we’ve got your animals right here!  If you already have the pets, we can feed ‘em; especially Rabbits!
- Propaganda services for subjugation of mindless peasants.
- Tortures galore; our trained minions of evil understand the importance of well-executed torture, whether it be needed for gloating over a captured enemy or the breaking of a maiden’s will to your eventual advances.  After we’re done with her, she’ll be happy to accept someone such as you!
- Mad scientists and evil geniuses are on our contact list, easily attainable for your needs.
- A willing audience; Our henchmen are trained to watch when ordered to, laugh on command, jeer when needed, submit when told, and cackle when you cackle.
- Incompetence control: we are happy to slay our own if they do not meet our exacting specifications, much less those of you, our ‘bad guy boss’ (if you haven’t already killed him yourself).
- Basic clothes and rags ready made for slaves; all of our supplies are made from 100% recycled good-guys, hand stitched by old, used up harem girls.
Here, look what I brung ya, boss! You want I should clean her off? -All weapons and fighting styles are taught to our henchmen, but when the sword-wielding kung-fu master good guy shows up we just shoot ‘im.
-Remember, Bob and his henchmen choose only the finest women from the flock for capture, who are then promptly, but not too promptly, brought before you.  We throw the ugly ones back!
Note; Bettie Page may not be available for bondage in some areas
When Plot is completely superfluous compared to a correct sacrificial costume change…

Contact Bob’s Evil Henchmen Services
PO Box 15-666
Bob’s Lair


Bob's Lamentation of the Unknown Henchman website is Copyright 2002 M&V/Scott P Vaughn
All unoriginal materials are presented here in the case of review.