007 - Dr. No:  (1962)  Bond's first film outing sees the beautiful Ursula Andress as Honey Rider, first in a long line of suggestively named love interests in the series.  She and Bond are captured by Dr. No, eventually invited to dinner (I've never understood THAT compulsion amongst evil overlords, mates), and thus Bond attempts to remove her from harm's way by asking her to be excused to her room.  Dr. No agrees, only to announce, "I'm sure the guards will amuse her."  And here again is the lamentable tragedy that is "off-camera action"; my curse, my bane, and my exile to the "cutting room floor", bugger it all.  Henchmen like me love to take the advantages we can, and its a rare dream when the Overlord in question actually gives the girl over to us.  Alas, it is not appreciated by the film commisions, and when you, the viewer, next race with Bond to Honey's rescue (several scenes later), you find her shackled to a loading ramp, water threatening to eventually rise enough to drown her, her apparel reduced to her top and panties (former pants suspiciously missing).  Damn the man.
No Mr. Bond, I expect you to eat.
Swimwear modelled by Ursula


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