Army of Darkness:  (1992)  Sam Raimi's current conclusion to the EVIL DEAD franchise, in all its excess and glory, is still a debatable lament for myself as the obligitory Wench Preparing Henchman.  In this film, romatic interest midieval babe of our hero, Ash (Bruce Cambell), has been captured by winged demon of the deadites.  The leader of this skeleton crew is none other than Ash's evil side, and naughty boys need love too.  So while she is given over to the Evil Overlord Ash in a great "bring on the wench!" scene, the other captured girlies (each of which is topless yet deftly covered by ribbon or hair) are led in chains for the obvious delights of the deadites.  Our heroin's dress is ripped to her waist as she struggles against the advances of bad Ash, and... and *sob* *sniff* and the camera pans back and cuts away to a different scene!..  (Grumbling sounds of disgust)  And thus is the teasing lament of American cinema!  I'd do it for free if it at least ended up ON CAMERA!  Man...!
Gimme some sugar baby
Bring on the Wench! CLICK ME FOR COLLAGE

REBUTTAL: Evil Dead:  (1982?) Ok, it doesn't really count as any sort of "Henchman" activity, but its not every day you see a tree have sexual relations with a woman...  Call it "Hench-Demon" activity.  Maybe "HenchTree"?  I dunno...
Help!  I'm a low-pay model who was never in this movie!
ACK!  I'm sorry!  I'll subscribe to GREENPEACE!!



Bob's Lamentation of the Unknown Henchman website is Copyright 2002 M&V/Scott P Vaughn
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